Today is International Men’s Day, a day the world pauses to acknowledge some amazing people amongst us; men. We pause to acknowledge the positive value men bring to families, communities, and society. Equally importantly, it’s a day to shine a spotlight on the challenges men face, particularly around their health and overall well-being; and let’s be honest, in the current social and economic climate, one of the heaviest burdens many men carry is financial stress.
For generations, the narrative has been that men must be the primary providers, the rock, the sole source of financial stability. While that script is finally changing, the pressure, internal and external, remains immense, and when that pressure of career expectations, family needs, and the sheer desire to “do well” starts to boil over, the fallout is rarely just about the money. It lands squarely on the man’s mental health.
The connection is undeniable: Financial stress is one of the leading causes of anxiety, depression, and relationship strain for men. But here’s the good news, you can improve both simultaneously.
The trick is building a bedrock of financial habits that are so simple and practical, that they actively reduce the mental load you carry every single day.
As we celebrate you today, we’re also sharing with you three simple, yet profound, habits that can transform your financial life and, by extension, boost your mental health.
1. The Clarity Habit: Knowing Your Numbers is a Superpower
Think of your finances like the dashboard of your car. If all the lights are blinking red, but you refuse to look, you’re just driving blind into a likely breakdown.
Many men have been known to avoid looking at their bank statements. Why? Because ignorance feels like a temporary form of peace. But that “peace” is a dangerous illusion. It’s the constant, low-level hum of anxiety that you can’t quite place, often revealing itself as the fear of the unknown.
The Clarity Habit is the simple act of facing your numbers, and it’s the single most effective way to switch off that background anxiety.
What You Can Do: The 15-Minute Weekly Sit-Down
You don’t need a spreadsheet, a budgeting app, or a six-hour seminar. You just need 15 minutes, once a week, ideally on a Saturday or Sunday evening, before the start of a new week.
The goal is to answer these two questions about your last seven days:
- “Where did the money go?”Look at your transaction history for that week and identify where your money went. Don’t judge it; just observe it. Was it mostly groceries, subscriptions, or did you drop a surprising amount on impulsive online purchases?
- “What is the plan for the next seven days?”Look at your calendar and upcoming bills. Do you have a big payment (insurance, rent) due? Do you have a social event? Allocate a set amount for your spending next week. If you have ₦50,000 left for discretionary spending, make that your limit.
That’s it. 15 minutes.
This simple exercise helps to replace fear with fact, the terrifying unknown becomes the manageable known. It’s a little activity that gives you an immense sense of control and takes the edge off the anxiety. It also stops the financial “leak”. It makes you more conscious of where your money is going; simply looking at your spending, can make you more mindful.
Once the 15 minute timer is up, you can genuinely tell yourself, “I’ve handled the money for the week,” freeing your mind to focus on work, family, or personal goals without the financial hum in the background.
2. The Separation Habit: Create Buffer Zones for Peace of Mind
We spoke with a couple of men and what we found to be another source of male anxiety is the knowledge that you could be one unexpected event away from a major personal financial crisis or complete “brokeness”. A car accident or a sudden medical bill; these are the punches that can turn a seemingly stable financial life into an emergency overnight.
Having a single pool of money is too fragile. When your savings, spending, and emergency funds are all sitting in one account, every dip feels like a threat to your security.
What you need is to develop a Separation Habit that helps you create designated, named accounts for different purposes. This builds financial resilience, which is essential for mental well-being.
What You Can Do: Open Two New Savings Accounts
Walk into your bank and set up two separate savings accounts. You can create new accounts on your Alternative Bank App. Give each account distinct, non-negotiable purposes:
1. The Shield Account (Emergency Fund):This is your defensive line. Its only job is to protect you from the unexpected. This money is for the car breakdown, the unexpected dental work, or a job loss. This account is a literal mental health buffer. Every naira you put in is a psychological weight lifted. It’s the difference between an emergency turning into a full-blown mental crisis versus a simple inconvenience. The goal is 3-6 months of living expenses, but start small: aim for a month’s living expenses and take it from there.
2. The Freedom Account (Future Self):This is your offensive line. Its job is to fund the life you want in the near future. Maybe it’s a down payment on a new car, a trip with your partner, or the funding for a course to pivot your career. This account injects hope and purpose into your daily grind. You are no longer just saving; you are saving for something. Saving for an abstract “future” can be hard and unmotivating, but saving for a specific, exciting goal is motivating and shifts your focus from scarcity to abundance.
With this habit, when you look at your main account or spend from it, you know you are only spending your ‘spending money’. Your emergency security and your future goals stash are locked away and safe, providing deep, quiet reassurance.
3. The Future Habit: Defining What ‘Enough’ Actually Looks Like
For many men, financial goal-setting is like a staircase or a treadmill. You chase the next salary bump, the next promotion, the next big purchase. But when do you know you are “okay”? The constant, undefined pursuit of “more” is a major driver of anxiety and burnout. It’s the silent killer of contentment.
The Future Habit is about stopping that treadmill just long enough to draw a clear line in the sand, to define your personal version of “Enough.”
This is where the financial conversation moves from spreadsheets to philosophy. It’s not about how much money you can make; it’s about how much money you need to live a life you genuinely love.
What You Can Do: The “Enough-To-Walk-Away” Calculation
This is the amount of money that allows you to walk away from a toxic situation, quit a soul-crushing job, or take a year off to reboot, without immediate financial ruin.
To do this, calculate your annual living expenses and multiply it by a factor that gives you psychological freedom.
- Step 1: Get the Annual Number.Using your 15-Minute Clarity Habit data, calculate your total annual spending. Let’s say it’s ₦6,000,000.
- Step 2: Calculate Your Freedom.How much money in the bank would allow you to take a breath?
- The “Deep Breath” Number (x1):This lets you quit your job and survive for a year while you find something better.
- The “Pivot” Number (x2):This lets you take a sabbatical, launch a business, or move across the country.
- The “Retire Early” Number (x25):This is a major goal, allowing you to sustain your lifestyle through investments indefinitely.
The number you choose isn’t a commitment; it’s a north star. You don’t have to hit the “Retire Early” number tomorrow, but knowing the “Pivot” number will give your saving purpose and dramatically change your mental state when you hit it.
This habit shifts your focus from an external, societal definition of success (the fancy watch, the bigger house) to an internal, purposeful definition (financial freedom, time with family, meaningful work). This move from “getting more” to “having enough” is a powerful shift toward contentment and mental peace.
Once you define your “Enough,” you stop comparing your life to others. If your goal is to have the freedom to take Fridays off, who cares if your neighbour drives a more expensive car? You have achieved your goal. Comparison is the thief of joy, and this habit robs the thief of its power.
This isn’t a journey to be taken alone. This calculation is a perfect, non-threatening way to start a deeper conversation with your financial advisor or partner. It moves the conversation from “We need to save more money!” (which is stressful) to “What if we had ₦X so we could start that business we’ve talked about for so long?”
The Takeaway on International Men’s Day
By adopting these three simple habits; Clarity, Separation, and Future-Defining, you don’t just secure your portfolio, you secure your mind. You exchange the silent, creeping anxiety of the unknown for the empowering, calming certainty of the plan.
This International Men’s Day, give yourself the most important gift of all: the gift of financial peace. You can start today, with just 15 minutes. Your future self, and your mental well-being, will thank you for it. Happy International Men’s Day.
